Yesterday we visited Diti's ortho paed surgeon at Mahim,an appointment 6 weeks post her Botox procedure.Maybe I went in with too many expectations and hopes,hoping he would say something that would make me immensely happy and joyous about her progress.The doctor was'nt pessimistic or negative.But what worried me was my attitude!Why can't I accept Diti for what she is?Why can't I accept the fact that she is physically challenged and needs my help and encouragement,rather than having me mope and feel let down by the doc's non commital replies!I keep asking myself this..okay I know I am her mother and I have an older normal child already,so i know the difference in caring for both kids.Ananya's childhood was bliss whereas Diti's is a challenge.It' s been 3 years now,3 years where I've seen,experienced,learnt and grown so much that I cannot remember now a life without Diti.In 3 years she has bloomed and blossomed with love and care.I never expected her to turn out to be sucha happy vibrant child,full of joy and mischief. I feel incredibly blessed.
But this question gnaws at me all the time,intermittently..
Why cant I just let things be,take it as it comes and use this time to strengthen myself mentally and emotionally rather than keep waiting with bated breath for a miracle to happen..
or is it that I beleive in miracles .......?